Children, whether they are yours or someone else's, lie. I know that some people out there might say "Not my children" but the truth is they all do it. Lately at my house it's been (fill in the blank) did it. They look at each other pointing fingers, crying, trying to get each other in trouble. Aries has gotten really good at this technique, so good in fact that she slapped Damien's leg today, started crying, and then screamed "HE DID IT!" all while pointing a finger at Damien.
Poor Damien looked shocked and was wildly trying his best to talk over her saying "No No I didn't do anything mom, look at my leg it's red". I let them hash it out a bit, just giving them the mom stare, only because I wanted to see if Aries would back down. Of course I didn't let them know I saw the whole thing (Moms really do have eyes on the back of their heads).
I asked Aries "Did Damien really hit you?" Now if I had my camera at this very moment you would have laughed. Damien was shaking his head no so much I thought it was going to fall off, Aries was looking at Damien with a smirk on her face and then turned around and looked at me with the biggest pout lip ever. She finally looked at me and said...."Yes he did!"
I pointed out how Damien's leg was red and how her leg wasn't. I pointed out that she smiled at Damien before she looked at me. But the most important thing I pointed out was that I knew she was lying. You can't expect a 3 year old to tell you why they did something (trust me I use to ask Damien this all the time when he was that age) all you get is "I don't know". One thing you can get is a real apology and not for me but for Damien.
Simply, while looking at her right in the eyes, I stated how disappointed I was and how I know that she knows not to lie. I sent her to her room. She came out a couple of minutes later, head down. I asked her " Are you ready to say your sorry to Damien?" She shook her head yes, went over to him said "Sorry I hit you", gave him a hug and kiss. This was not over yet, not because I am mean or heartless, but because the lesson was in lying. Yes hitting is a no no too but she needs to know that both are equally not good. She apologized to me as well for lying.
Then 5 minutes passed and they were back to normal, playing like nothing ever happened. I know this will not be the end of the (fill in the blank) did it, sometimes the cat up at my mom's house gets blamed for something that happened 2 seconds ago, but I know my children will know right from wrong.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
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